Your browser is out of date. Some of the content on this site will not work properly as a result.
Upgrade your browser for a faster, better, and safer web experience.

Infographic: Hollywouldn’t

Each year, we pick our favourite offerings from Reddit’s ‘Pitch a movie’ portal for the best of the worst film ideas proposed by online movie lovers. Here’s this year’s selection of films that definitely won’t make it to the big screen, as featured in Delayed Gratification #23.

To see this infographic in glorious print, buy a copy of the magazine in our shop or subscribe with promotion code ‘SOCIAL20’ and receive the issue for free.


The Auctioneers
“Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson are small-town auctioneers who decide to up their game and start auctioning higher and higher value items (including women, of course) and that’s where all the trouble starts!”


The Bungee Instructor
“A man living alone abroad is a bungee-jump instructor. One day he has three jumpers – each conversation leads to flashbacks and reveals why he lives like he does. In the end he would either jump or go home and sort his life out I haven’t decided yet.”


What If
“Rob Snyder and Kevin Hart play a life coach and his protégé who has something with comic opportunity eg Tourette’s, crack addiction. The teacher gives the student a wand which switches Donald Trump’s soul for that of a paranoid drug dealer.”


Island Fever
“Low budget, found footage-style movie about a man who wakes up alone on a small remote island and slowly begins to fall deeper into insanity. Shot on a single GoPro with one small time actor.”


Mice & Friends
“Mice figure out that humans are scared of them and use that power to gather spiders, snakes, wasps, etc. to build a world that accommodates their every desire. All at the cost of humans.”


“Two millennials whose parents were computer scientists who stopped the Y2K virus, have to go back in time, stop their parents and make the Y2K virus happen so that the best parts of the ’90s continue forever.”


Predator vs The Apache
“It’s the 1400s. The Tinneh Native Americans reign supreme in what is now the US and encounter the Predator. [It’s] the killer elite of primitive man vs the ultimate ‘trophy hunter’ race. Not sure on the title as I now realize people may think it’s about airplane dogfights…”


Death from Down Under
“Kangaroos have been biologically altered to provide an alternative meat source, but the plan goes wrong when they develop larger brains and flee to an island resort full of couples. It is a bloody mess mate when the roos take control and kill and kick their way to total chaos.”


Wonderboy: Battle of the Bards
“In a parallel world comedians compete to be King of the Bards and Wonderboy strives to achieve greatness. When Magic Steve (Steve Martin) switches places with the real Martin, Wonderboy joins forces with Nastyman to save Steve from the clutches of Adamn Singler’s (Adam Sandler) evil bard guild.”

A slower, more reflective type of journalism”
Creative Review

Jam-packed with information... a counterpoint to the speedy news feeds we've grown accustomed to”
Creative Review

A leisurely (and contrary) look backwards over the previous three months”
The Telegraph

Quality, intelligence and inspiration: the trilogy that drives the makers of Delayed Gratification”
El Mundo

Refreshing... parries the rush of 24-hour news with 'slow journalism'”
The Telegraph

A very cool magazine... It's like if Greenland Sharks made a newspaper”
Qi podcast

The UK's second-best magazine” Ian Hislop
Editor, Private Eye
Private Eye Magazine

Perhaps we could all get used to this Delayed idea...”
BBC Radio 4 - Today Programme